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Benefits Of Staying With Parents After Marriage Young People Essay

2701 words (11 pages) Essay in Young People

5/12/16 Young People Reference this

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Every time you get off work and walk into that the community where your home is, you must overhear a lot of juicy news while you walk past those full-time housewives, sitting together and gossiping what happened recently in their neighbors’ home. It is true that the contents are mostly about the tough relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Even though you may not be interested about this, you cannot deny those things have happened to you, or, unfortunately, you are coping with it now. Well, to be honest, that is also the main reason why so many couples choose to live away from their parents-in-law. But, is that the right way to solve all the problems? And is that a good choice?

For me, actually, to solve all these complicated problems are just staying with parents after married. Living with parents can make the relationship more stable, benefit children’s education and slow down the process of aging of parents.

Firstly, living with parents leads to a happy marriage. I think it is not a solution but an excuse that living away from parents is for a harmony relationship with parents-in-law. Mostly, this kind of decision is made by young couples. There are some brides who insist on not living with her husband’s parents. They don’t want to change their own, as well as protecting their own living space from parents. Too many of them have already tired of the fierce competition from their career. All they want to do is just go back home to have a good rest instead of racking their brains to do something to please parents. Therefore getting away from parents-in-law can make it easier. That is what they say distance helps.

We can see so many words, such as “we”, “own”, “want”. They just turn out to be nothing but selfish. Is that so bad as the couples describe¼Ÿ

How can young people say that they are too tired to make effort to make an improvement? Family is the most important thing to everyone. People who care about us most are parents. Most of us can bear with the defects of others. However, when it comes to parents, they behave differently. It is like putting the cart before the horse.

It is said that the divorce rate in China has increased by almost 20% over past year, with 1.4m couples filing for separation during 2007 (see the news published on Friday, 25 January 2008). It is also said that since China’s one-child policy was established, in 1973. The number of people getting divorce has quadrupled. That policy has produced a generation of adults focused on their own needs and unable to sustain a relationship. To build a harmonious family relationship, living with parents-in-law can make sense, because the older generation can deal with problems much better. The new couples will learn from them, learn to compromise and cooperate to make a marriage work well. Obviously, the relationship will be more stable.

Secondly, it can benefit children’s education to live with parents. So busy the young couples are, it is almost impossible for them to set aside more time for their own children. As a result, these children are sent to their grandparents. However, grandparents always spoil children more than children’s parents do, which cause the children to be selfish and moody. Moreover, for the lack of time with parents, it can be even worse after children grow up. Parents will not be able to communicate with their children well when there has been a barrier between them. If children can live with both parents and grandparents, doting grandparents will have the awareness of being strict to children, and children will enjoy more time with their parents. Being around by eldership and their children, couples will think twice before doing anything, which, at the same time, avoids being unfaithful to their partner. Growing up in a family with such a harmonious atmosphere, these children will be more likely to get a happy marriage contributed by easygoing, optimistic, and responsible personalities.

The last but not least, living with parents can also slow down their aging process. The rapid decrease in the birth rate, combined with improving life expectancy, has led to an increasing proportion of elderly people and an increase in the ratio between elderly parents and adult children. In China, the percentage of the population over the age of 65 years was 5 percent in 1982 and now stands at 7.5percent but is expected to rise to more than 15 percent by 2025(The Effect of China’s One-Child Family Policy after 25 Years Therese Hesketh, Ph.D., Li Lu, M.D., and Zhu Wei Xing, M.P.H.). The mental health of senior is increasingly important. Company from families is the best doctor for them avoiding the feeling of loneliness. Living together can not only decrease the speed of being slow reaction but also let the young couples have a good knowledge of their parents’ condition. As a result, parents will gain a longer lifespan which is also a gift to couples. In return, taking good care of the old parents is a good example to their children. They will learn that from young couples on their own. Parents are always the best teacher to children.

Even so, many newly married wives still get along well with their parents-in-law. That is reasonable. They don’t have same living habit. Everyone in family will adjust themselves to the new situation. It must need time. Everybody knows that family is a cell of the whole society. We are obliged to make it work well. Marriage is not only about couples themselves. Trust me, rainbow comes after storm. A better understanding can be got after living with parents.

To sum up, it can only have good results by living with parents, for it can lead to a happy marriage, benefit children’s education and slow down the process of aging of parents.

Outline

I. Topic: Talking about whether the couples should live with their parents or parents-in-law after married.

II Thesis Statement: Living with parents can make the relationship more stable, benefit children’s education and slow down the process of aging of parents.

III Antithesis: It is better for them to live separated with their parents

1. Couples do not have their own living space.

2. They have to make efforts to please parents after get off work.

3. Get away from parents can avoid misunderstanding.

IV Reasons: 1. living with parents leads to a happy marriage.

i. Now young couples are more selfish than before so that they don’t know how to get along well with each other

ii.The divorce rate are increasing rapidly because of the one-child policy.

2. it can benefit children’s education to live with parents.

i. The young couples sent children to parents. The old always spoil their grandchildren.

ii.Children can have more time with parents if family members live together.

iii.Growing in a happy family, children will be more positive and responsible than others.

3. living with parents can also slow down their aging process.

i. Living with children and grandchildren can make them feel they are younger.

ii.Children can know the condition of old parents very well.

iii.It is a good way to teach children how to be good children.

Strategies: Use Tactful, Courteous Language; Point Out Common Ground; Acknowledge Differing Viewpoints.

Introduction:

For me, actually, to solve all these complicated problems are just staying with parents after married. Living with parents can make the relationship more stable, benefit children’s education and slow down the process of aging of parents.

Conclusion:

To sum up, it can only have good results by living with parents, for it can lead to a happy marriage, benefit children’s education and slow down the process of aging of parents

Body:

Firstly, living with parents leads to a happy marriage. I think it is not a solution but an excuse that living away from parents is for a harmony relationship with parents-in-law. Mostly, this kind of decision is made by young couples. There are some brides who insist on not living with her husband’s parents. They don’t want to change their own, as well as protecting their own living space from parents. Too many of them have already tired of the fierce competition from their career. All they want to do is just go back home to have a good rest instead of racking their brains to do something to please parents. Therefore getting away from parents-in-law can make it easier. That is what they say distance helps.

We can see so many words, such as “we”, “own”, “want”. They just turn out to be nothing but selfish. Is that so bad as the couples describe¼Ÿ

How can young people say that they are too tired to make effort to make an improvement? Family is the most important thing to everyone. People who care about us most are parents. Most of us can bear with the defects of others. However, when it comes to parents, they behave differently. It is like putting the cart before the horse.

It is said that the divorce rate in China has increased by almost 20% over past year, with 1.4m couples filing for separation during 2007 (see the news published on Friday, 25 January 2008). It is also said that since China’s one-child policy was established, in 1973. The number of people getting divorce has quadrupled. That policy has produced a generation of adults focused on their own needs and unable to sustain a relationship. To build a harmonious family relationship, living with parents-in-law can make sense, because the older generation can deal with problems much better. The new couples will learn from them, learn to compromise and cooperate to make a marriage work well. Obviously, the relationship will be more stable.

Secondly, it can benefit children’s education to live with parents. So busy the young couples are, it is almost impossible for them to set aside more time for their own children. As a result, these children are sent to their grandparents. However, grandparents always spoil children more than children’s parents do, which cause the children to be selfish and moody. Moreover, for the lack of time with parents, it can be even worse after children grow up. Parents will not be able to communicate with their children well when there has been a barrier between them. If children can live with both parents and grandparents, doting grandparents will have the awareness of being strict to children, and children will enjoy more time with their parents. Being around by eldership and their children, couples will think twice before doing anything, which, at the same time, avoids being unfaithful to their partner. Growing up in a family with such a harmonious atmosphere, these children will be more likely to get a happy marriage contributed by easygoing, optimistic, and responsible personalities.

The last but not least, living with parents can also slow down their aging process. The rapid decrease in the birth rate, combined with improving life expectancy, has led to an increasing proportion of elderly people and an increase in the ratio between elderly parents and adult children. In China, the percentage of the population over the age of 65 years was 5 percent in 1982 and now stands at 7.5percent but is expected to rise to more than 15 percent by 2025(The Effect of China’s One-Child Family Policy after 25 Years Therese Hesketh, Ph.D., Li Lu, M.D., and Zhu Wei Xing, M.P.H.). The mental health of senior is increasingly important. Company from families is the best doctor for them avoiding the feeling of loneliness. Living together can not only decrease the speed of being slow reaction but also let the young couples have a good knowledge of their parents’ condition. As a result, parents will gain a longer lifespan which is also a gift to couples. In return, taking good care of the old parents is a good example to their children. They will learn that from young couples on their own. Parents are always the best teacher to children.

Even so, many newly married wives still get along well with their parents-in-law. That is reasonable. They don’t have same living habit. Everyone in family will adjust themselves to the new situation. It must need time. Family is a cell of the whole society. We are obliged to make it work well. Marriage is not only about couples themselves. Trust me, rainbow comes after storm. A better understanding can be got after living with parents.

Prewriting

Every time people get off work and walk into that residence community, we must overhear much juicy news when you pass by those full-time housewife sitting together talking about the things happened recently in their families. It seems that they know everything there. However, most of them are the tough relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Even you may not be interested in that, but you can not deny those things have happened to you, or, unfortunately, you are in that now. Well, to be honest, that is also the reason why so many couples choose to live separated with their parents-in-law. I always think that is not a solution but an excuse to live alone for a good relationship with parents-in-law. Living separated with parents-in-law is a choice made by young couples. There are some new wives who insist not live with her husband parents. They don’t want to make a change to their own, as well as protecting their own living space from parents. To many of them, they are tired of the fierce competition of their career. All they want to do is just go back home to have a good rest. They don’t want to rack their brains to do something to please parents. So getting away from parents-in-law can make it easier. Distance helps.

We can see so many words, such as we, own, want …They just turn out to be nothing but selfish. Is that so bad as the couples describe? How can young people say that thing they are too tired to make effort to make a improvement? Family is the most important thing to everyone…The people who care us most are families. Most of us can bear with defects of others, but when it comes to parents, it is another thing. It is putting the cart before the horse. Divorce rate in China has increased much. The number of people getting a divorce has quadrupled. That policy has produced a generation of adults focused on their own needs and unable to sustain a relationship. To build a harmonious family relationship, living with parents-in-law can make sense, because the preceding generation can deal with problems much better than them. The new couples will learn from that, even do as their parents do. Obviously, the relationship will be more stable. It is difficult for them to set aside more time for their children. As a result, these children are sent to their grandparents. However, grandparents always spoil children more than children’s parents do. And the lack of time with parents will make problems after they grow up. If children can live with both parents and grandparents, the parents can reduce that spoiling, and children will get more happiness with their parents. Growing up in a family with such a harmonious atmosphere, children will have a great advantage to have a happy marriage depending on their optimistic and responsible personality.

Marriage does not only involve two people. It influences almost everything. Living with parents after married can be a good solution to many problems we face today.

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