Naturally, family is made up of mother, father, and children. Children are supposed to be raised by both parents, and we all accept that father and mother have vital roles in upbringing their children into potential and useful people to contribute to social development. However, it is quite challenging if we want to compare whether mother or father is more important. What if mother is more important, is she has to assume more responsibility, or what if father is, ought he to assume more? On my point of view, in no account should parents assume unequal responsibility due to children development sake, the difficulty of raising children, and family happiness.
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Whether or not children are nurtured with equal responsibility from mother and father has effect on children’s development throughout their lives. With both cares, children get full experience of live from both mother and father because what father can give to children is different from that of the mother, but it doesn’t mean one is less important than the other. Mother can teach children how to cook, how to sew, or how to deal with household chore while father can teach them how to fish, to be strong, or to protect oneself from any danger. And some circumstances children need advice from father and other circumstances, only mother is more suitable to give advice. On top of that it is also known that with both parents care, children benefit in their braveness. Children will feel confident around the house, at school, or elsewhere because they think they are equal to other, and they have both parents supporting them. Oppositely, if one side fails to care their children, it means that half of knowledge is leak sine rarely can either a mother or father completely function as both roles. Not only does their knowledge is affected, but also children are more likely to have gone to wrong path as Peiitea in his article had quoted “You need both eyes to see the clear path. Without one, it becomes blurry and you may be sidetracked from the path and may not be able to find your way again” (peiitea, 2011). Imagine when a child who is fatherless or motherless walking on the street and sees other children with their mother and father, how would they feel? It would upset the children, and improper behavior will occur as the result of this upset feeling.
The National Fatherhood Initiative, U.S. Bureau of Census for the FBI researched and gathered statistics related to children who were raised in a household without a father. Individuals who were father deprived make up 72% of all teenager murderers. 60% of the rapists in society also did not have an active father figure in their life. 70% of young people who are incarcerated today suffer from father deprivation as well. Children who lack a father growing up are twice as likely to quit school and eleven times more likely to have violent behavior. Three out of four teenage suicides also have the common factor of an absentee father. 80% of adolescents in psychiatric hospitals do not have a father figure in their lives as well as 90% of all run-aways (Watergrl76, 2012).
Moreover children also face confidence leaking problem with the absence of one side. Biologically, father is the one who give his daughter emotion confident, protection, and affection. According to an article online, women without fathers tend to have low self-confidence around men. They are weak and hide what their boundaries are (Paul, 2008). In all, It is precise that children without or less care from father do ruin their lives. The absence or unequal responsibility may upset their development.
Secondly, raising children is not easy task. When they were babies, from milk, food, cloth, cleaning, learning to walk, or sleep is all stressful. They are twenty four hours needed to be taken care of. What if the baby gets sick, not only money that you have to pay but also the nervousness you encounter. As they grow up and go to school, more thing parents need to concern whether they study well, make friend with gangster, play school truant, or eat something unhealthy. Furthermore, every children is different, using old way to teach children will not work to your own children. You need more time to observe them and choose the best way. In an article I read online, mentions taking care children is extremely hard, and wrong way of teaching children is frustrating for you as well as the child. Raising the child alone is even tougher. (TOSSER, 2009). Mother or father alone can’t handle those stresses. Remember besides your children who need care, you yourself also need to rest. You need a partner who can give encouragement and warm. Nevertheless, with both parents share responsibility, thing is solved.
Last but not least, that both parent share equal responsibility increases family happiness. The more time you are with each other, the more understanding you have for each other. Everyone in the family feel close and warm. It brings peaceful environment to children as well the whole family. In an online article also proves that when both parents have a collaboration and fantastic agreement in adopting children, family makes less argument (Both Parents should Assume Equal Responsibility in Raising Children , 2011). In contrast, without one side care, both the children and the member family feel they are neglected. Children feel they don’t receive love from father, and mother feel father don’t willing to help her. Nothing is worse than parent care only working and don’t have time for family.
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My counterpart might say that parents can’t share equal responsibility because father is busier at work to own for the living. He doesn’t have time to take care of their children. Mother needs to be responsible for it. This argument has some merit on the surface. Remember marriage is not all our sharing task to do, but love. Work at house, taking care of the baby and household, is much more stressful then the job outside. In addition, everyone is busy; it is just the matter of how you manage your time, and what if mother unfortunately passes away, who will take care of our children? How could you support to take care of them when you and they are almost stranger? If father don’t have time for his children, it will reduce the family happiness.
To sum up, because of the interest of children’s development, the stress of raising children, and the family satisfaction, sharing equal responsibility is a must. Every parent should take this into consideration because children are weak and innocent they need both cares and support to help them accept new thing, learn the social value, and meet with the social expectation.
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