Always Remain Mine Forever English Literature Essay

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The day I first met her transformed my whole life and I cant imagine falling in love again. It was a bright early summers day when I had decided to go to the local Borough market to buy some groceries and do the weekly shopping. I was in a hurry, walking very inhumanly when accidentally I collided into a woman. I felt extremely ashamed of myself. The woman held a basket full of shopping which consisted of multi-coloured fruits and vegetables; then again many had fallen on the floor now being treaded upon by the public passing by. Immediately I knelt onto the ground to pick up the remaining few fruits and vegetables that were intact in shape and placed them into her basket.

The woman's bright blue sparkling eyes had a shine to each pupil and were now fixed on me in absolute astonishment. She must have felt greatly devastated however, there was no sign portraying the slightest anger in her face. Meanwhile we stood motionless facing one another with no words being exchanged and time flew by like a bird on a wing. People walked past us, they must have considered us to be obstacles in their pathway. In her eyes, I appeared to be a giant man wearing muddy clothes with an overgrown beard, as I was a farmer. She had an average height and an elegant figure. I witnessed her cheeks reddening resembling the colour of tomatoes. She appeared very shy and portrayed a feeling of uneasiness. I experienced a strange magnetic attraction to this woman. I recognised that the pace of my heart beat was accelerating. My stare made her feel rather uncomfortable and the sound of residents gossiping brought us back into reality and quickly she gathered her shopping and vanished from the place. This was the very moment dear readers, for the first time ever I had truly discovered the love of my life!

The sensation of being in love followed me day in and night. For two continuous weeks I visited the same Borough market, waiting impatiently in hope of meeting her or catching sight of her but I constantly remained unsuccessful. Week after week passed by, in due course the summer season was drawing itself to an end. Autumn season arrived and passed by and it was now time for winter. The thought of ever meeting her again tormented me because winter was extreme in this country. At this stage I was immensely longing to encounter a chance meeting with the attractive woman as I was now undoubtedly in love with powerful emotive feelings. Until one day at last I caught a glimpse of her but this time not in the same market but by a river near my very own house. Immediately the thought that this was my only chance and the fact that I had been looking for her all this time made me run over to meet her. After many months we suddenly met face to face. I asked her

'May I know of your name?' to which she tenderly replied 'Porphyria'.

'What a beautiful name' I replied.

She then asked me 'and what is your name' to which I replied Christopher knight.

From that day onwards we met occasionally and had got to know one another better. I imagine she would have felt the same. There was one thing missing, she had never invited me for a meal at her place or ever mentioned that she would introduce me to her parents. So I decided to invite her over. I asked her 'would you like to come over for a meal at my house this weekend?'

In her sweet voice she replied 'that would be delightful'.

I then gave her a note with my address on and told her how eagerly I would be expecting her. We then parted. The week passed by, it was now Sunday 14th February the perfect day for me to confess my love to Porphyria. I was expecting Porphyria to come at 9pm but she never. My mind ticked with irrelevant thoughts, where is she? Why has she not come? Have her parents found out about our affair?. I was sat in my arm chair eagerly awaiting for her entry and feeling rather drowsy. I fell asleep at one point when immediately my eyes snapped open at the sound of the howling icy wind battling with my windows. 'The rain had set early in tonight; the sullen wind was awake doing its worst to vex the lake'. The trees swayed side to side, like a shadow of a person.

The clock ticked 12am midnight when Porphyria made entry. She peered through the door as I quickly closed my eyes and pretended to be sleeping. Porphyria knew I was awake. Her nose looked rather sharp with the icy cold and her cheeks were bright red. She started conversing with me and described her journey to me and informing me that she was at a family feast. At the same time I observed her every move. Porphyria 'withdrew her dripping cloak and shawl and laid her soiled gloves'. She shut the cold out and the storm and made the house all warm by turning on the heating. She took her hat off and her yellow straw like hair fell down her back. Her soiled gloves made me rather doubtful about where she must have came from. We engaged in a slight conflict but then the whole room went quiet and strange. I gave up on realising her voice was very queer and Porphyria had a very pale look.

Dizziness overcame Porphyria. I asked her about her condition but she simply replied 'I am fine'. I imagine she would have not told me about how she must have felt, knowing that I would not be able to take it in. I observed Porphyria in great abdominal pain; she made her shoulder bare and cared for me more than she would ever look after herself. Porphyria 'murmured how she loved me' but I completely ignored her. Then again taking into account that Porphyria 'came through rain and wind' I realised 'Porphyria worshipped me'

I told Porphyria to take rest. This time I cared for Porphyria, repeating her very early actions and returning her hard work. I became entranced by her long yellow straw like hair and her beautiful features. The thought that my dear love was suffering troubled me. I did not think about what Porphyria would have thought if she was awake, or what her family would have felt and decided with a set mind to set her 'struggling passion free'. 'In one long yellow string I wound, three times her little throat around and strangled her'. She revealed no pain 'as a shut bud that holds a bee'. Her cheeks blushed for the last time 'beneath my burning kiss'. I spent the rest of the night besides her corpse, wondering whether I had done the right thing.

I thought to myself God would not forgive me for this, neither cast his blessings upon me. A punishment for me was inevitable as I played God and took life away with my stained black heart. On the other hand I set her struggling passion free and left her to be taken care of by God which is why I reckon 'God has not said a word!....

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