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There are few common barriers to good and effective listening. One of them is, Knowing the answer It means that you assume that you already have an idea on the content of the message before the speaker actually finishes his statements. In some situation, you might interrupt him or selfishly try to make the sentence complete for him. The worst thing is you interfere the speaker and say you are disagreeing with their opinion. It is rude because you are not letting others to finish up their sentences. This is the main factor that makes a discussion to end up without a decision and it is common happen when two team in an organization have their own idea and both not listening each other and stand on their own decision. It can be said that you are not appreciating and not value the message send by the speaker to you by distracting the speaker before letting them to finish their sentences. Crucial component in good listening is showing respect to the speaker. Pre-judgement on what the speaker going to say or it can be said as closed mindedness contributes to listening barrier. Be open or receptive minded person is a characteristic of a good listener. Good listener will stretch his mind and looks for available chance to obtain new idea or insight rather than stick to existing idea or their own point of view.
Other than that, "trying to be helpful" is another barrier in listening skill. Although we assume that it seems to be beneficial if we are trying to be helpful, but it turns into horrible situation when it come into listening. It's actually interferes effective listening. This is because the listener is considering solving the speaker's problem. The result is the listener misses the words throws or what actually message said by the speaker. "When walking, walk. When eating, eat.", this is some proverb say in old Zen. This can be clearly stated that we need to put our full attention to anything that we are currently doing. It is worth stressing that the aim of good listening depends on how much attention we put on listening to receive the message sends by the speaker's. Giving advice during speaker try to explain something which they experience may break the flow of conversation. Thus, it affects both parties by which the speaker did not pass the message accurately and the listener did not get the exact content from the communication process. "Messiah complex" is one of the common problem faces by many people. It can well describe as we try to rescue or fix other people problem as a means of feeling fulfilled. This type of people usually not called as problem-solvers. A good manager is not a problem-solver but a mind maker. They do listen to their employee's problem but reflect the problem back in very clear picture with few suggestions which may help them to solve the problem.
Nevertheless, mannerism can be a huge obstacle to good listening. Trying to say something while listening will also reflect that you have made particular judgments about the message sender which is the speaker. Emotional distractions carry few percentages in ineffective communication. Early judgement by the listener can mean that the listener does not have whole comprehended on the message though by the speaker. The true act of love and respect which you can offer is you give a person your 100% attention while listening. Listen and understand your team mate can empower the relationship between team members because human beings are such social animals. When an employee starts to explain their long-term problem among their collides and you offer a facile or off-the-cuff solution and this can be inappropriate. This is because you might forget that the speaker may take into consideration your immediate solution long time before.
Another significant barrier to good listening is some people feel that it is a sign of weakness when we agree or in the same line with the speaker during a heated conference. They feel induced to argue each point the speaker said even though if the listener inwardly agrees. The person who keeps arguing will wins the most point in a discussion. When we treat a discussion as a competition will be the biggest barriers to good listening. It prevents the listener from viewing an idea in difference prospective. It can be very frustrating on behalf of the speaker. This situation often we can see in an organization. When two teams try to defend their own opinion and idea, they tend to interfere when opposition team explaining their arguments. This can affect the productivity of a company. If this matter gets even worse, it can lead into rupture organization.
A good listener just relies on listening. Any unnecessary motive will indirectly diminish the concentration of the listener. Trying to influence or impress the speaker is an example of ulterior motive. When a listener's have any other agenda rather than simply to understand what the speaker's try to think and feel will not helping them to focus while listening. "People can understand a language three or two times faster than any words they speak" this is what been claim by psychologists. This shows that a listener has a lot of extra mental "bandwidth" or wide range of field to think about other things during conversation. Spare few space or capacity to contemplate about what the content of message send by speaker will be a valuable characteristic of a good listener. During conversation process in an organization, an ulterior motive employee will try to impress the manager and will possibly make use of the spare capacity to start thinking of his "next move". This type of employee will think what they need to say next or rebuttal when their manager finished with their statements. The employee is not focusing on understanding the message send to them.
"Believing in language" can be arduous barriers to an effective listening. In other word is, we tend to interpret some rarely used or double meaning words with unmatched meaning. Some people think that, language can be a guessing game. Both speaker and listener use language to surmise each other to think on the subject matter. Some words do have several meaning. When the speaker throws any words by assuming that listener must understand it, thus the fallacy on the speaker side. It is not practical to think that definition of a word can be sent live from the dictionary to the listener through the word. "Why didn't you understand, I already said it perfectly and clearly?", this is an example of fallacy which a speaker may do during conversation. Of course, the simple-minded assumption here is words that other people understand can be understand by others too. These can be applicable, when particular word containing absolute meaning. This is because each word gives unique effect to a person. The consequence is the person will try to relate the word based on their unique experience. Few differences can be tolerated but it will cause misunderstanding when we try to interpret most of the word in our own definition and experience. It will become a severe problem when senior worker use any word or term in conversation which based on experience with their junior worker. If the junior worker does not have the same experience as the senior worker, then the words is pointless. The worst case is the junior worker may silently make the word match with a difference experience.
There are few strategies can be taken to create a good listening. A good listener will lend their ears and put 100% concentration in listening to the statements said by the speaker and also to what partially said or left unsaid. Listening involves observing inconsistencies between non-verbal and verbal messages and noticing body language of the message sender. There will be a conflict between non-verbal and verbal messages when a person says to you that they are happy but their eyes filling with tears and gritted teeth. We can make an assumption that the message is untrue. Listening require our focus and start to stimulate our senses to digest the message rather than simply hear the words spoken.Â Effective listening not just depends on our ears to hear but it is a complex process that requires all our senses to interconnect each other to interpret received message.
The first strategy is to stop talking when other is talking. "If we were supposed to talk more than we listen, we would have two tongues and one ear.", Mark Twain. As a listener, stop talking and just listen.Â Do not disrupt the conversation or to be smart finish their statements. An employee may ask question to their supervisor regarding the task given for better understanding in order to done the assignment in a proper way. This clarifying process take place as the supervisor finishes his last word and not in the middle of conversation.
Besides that, prepare yourself to listen. A good listener will relax andÂ focus on the words thrown by the speaker.Â Free your mind and avoid to think unrelated things from the topic been discussed. "What's my mom cooks today? Do I need to buy new motorcycle?", this unnecessary question will make the listener to lose their attention on the message. In other word "day-dream". Try to put other thoughts out of mind and concentrate on the messages that are being communicated. Environment plays an important role during communication process. Human brain can easily lose its focus in noisy environment. It is advisable for the manager to pass any important task to their employees in manager room. The environment will be peace from any disturbance. Thus, it leads to a successful communication.
Another significant way to improve listening is put the speaker at ease. Make the speaker comfortable and help him to feel free to voice out his opinion.Â As a good manager in an organization, he or she needs to bear in mind that they are responsible on the employee welfare. All feedback needs to be taking into consideration. Talk nicely, nod or use any other gestures to promote them to continue speaking which may help to improve current organization environment.Â Maintain good eye contact and don't stare to the employees. This shows that, you are paying attention listening what is being said. Avoid from look out the windows, doodle, shuffle papers or any other action during conversation which can make the employee uncomfortable during communication. If the managers fail to put themselves out from any interruption else it will indirectly send messages to the employee that you are distracted or bored with current conversation.
Empathy can be defined as selfless act. From this valuable characteristic we will be able to learn more about people. This would be the best way to maintain our good relationships with others. We and the society will take the benefits from this desirable skill. There are some phrases that that imply empathy such 'soul mates' and 'being in your shoes'. This skill likened as religious or spiritual state of connection with other person. Mahatma Gandhi said that "I call him religious who understands the suffering of others.". We need to take other person's point of view into consideration. As a Chief Executive Officer in an organization, we use to neglect any issues highlighted by the employees. We might at issues from their perspective. Â Let go of preconceived ideas. Â By having an open mind we can more fully empathise with the speaker.Â If the speaker says something that you disagree with then wait and construct an argument to counter what is said but keep an open mind to the views and opinions of others.
8. Listen to the Tone. Effective speaking has nothing to do with the outdate concept of 'elocution' where everyone was encouraged to speak in the same 'correct' manner.Â Rather, effective speaking concerns being able to speak in a public context with confidence and clarity, while at the same time reflecting one's own personality. Volume and tone both add to what someone is saying.Â A good speaker will use both volume and tone to their advantage to keep an audience attentive; everybody will use pitch, tone and volume of voice in certain situations - let these help you to understand the emphasis of what is being said. Listen for Ideas - Not Just Words. You need to get the whole picture, not just isolated bits and pieces.Â Maybe one of the most difficult aspects of listening is the ability to link together pieces of information to reveal the ideas of others.Â Â With proper concentration, letting go of distractions, and focus this becomes easier.
10. Wait and Watch for Non-Verbal Communication. Gestures, facial expressions, and eye-movements can all be important. Â We don't just listen with our ears but also with our eyes - watch and pick up the additional information being transmitted via non-verbal communication. Do not jump to conclusions about what you see and hear. You should always seek clarification to ensure that your understanding is correct. Non-verbal communications includeÂ facial expressions, theÂ tone and pitchÂ of the voice,Â gesturesÂ displayed throughÂ body language (kinesics)Â and the physicalÂ distance between communicators (proxemics). These non-verbal signals can give clues and additional information and meaning over and above spoken (verbal) communication.