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The football coach, Vince Lombardy who got famous for making winners out of losers" said it doesn`t matter how bad we think we are, we start with small goals, do our best in order to get used to winning so we can get the "winning feeling" so we`ll always have the winning expectation.
Stop using the world "failure." Instead, a- say what you did and didn`t accomplish, b- accept all results, c- meditate on what you could learn from that situation, and d- ask if you can reach those goals and expectations.
If your goal is to grow, you can never fail! It doesn`t really matter how many times you fail to accomplish a specific situation, you always succeed at learning from it. Therefore, the main goal in your life should be learning, and you can succeed - no matter how many times you`ve fail.
Self-confidence is the arranged probability that a goal will be achieved by a certain person in a situation. For example if Mike values his possibility of getting an "A" on a math's exam is 90%, we would finish by saying Mike had very high self-confidence in his skill to do well on a math's exam. If Mike had thought 10%, we would say he`d had low self-confidence about his skills to do well on the exam.
It is crucial to remember that self-confidence is related to the task and situation. Self confidence has to do with the situation. We have varied degrees of assertiveness in varied situations. For example, Mike might be confident in calculus; but lack confidence in English. He may think his probabilities of success when meeting someone is only 10% (in relation to making a new friend). Confidence is associated to these situation, task, and expectations.
Though self-confidence is situational, self-confidence might generalize across many situations. For example, guess Ricky was good not just in calculus, but in almost all academic subjects. He`d probably expand self-confidence to learn any whatever he wants those things he hadn`t tried. If Ricky is even good at sports, people skills, and other areas of life, he`d probably expand high level of self-confidence generally.
In the same way, if Jeff didn`t perform well in science, sports, social situation , and most areas, then he would probably develop a poor self-confidence generally. Anyways, most of people aren`t like Ricky or Jeff. Most of them think we do well in some things (like science) but not so good in others (like dealing with conflict or getting to know people).
I use this term "self-confidence" to say what Dr. Albert Bandura, a researcher and psychologist, called "self-efficacy expectations." It`s been the object of forceful study in psychology and led to many important discoveries. Broadly speaking, High self-confidence extends people's motivation and persistence. it`s a good know how well people will do on all sorts of tasks when they have self-confidence.
A positive self-fulfilling prophesies is if you believe, "Harry will possibly like me if I talk with him." That belief alone might help cause you talk to Harry therefore you will be friendlier to him. Thus, the belief alone really expanded the probability it would be fulfilled (the belief really helped the prophesy`s fulfillment.)
A pessimistic self-fulfilling prophesies is your belief, "Harry will probably not like you at all if you talk with him." That belief might keep you from speaking with her or cause you to be more unfriendly to him. In turn, Harry may not like you because you weren`t friendly to him.
If you believed, "If you think it will rain, your belief will actually make it rain (because my beliefs have some magical powers on the weather)?" what is the difference when you think like that and that you can learn math.
It is very important to identify the difference between the self-fulfilling prophesy and the superstitious belief. A superstitious thought is, for instance, a belief that something is a cause of a result when it truly is not. For example your beliefs have accidental impact on your motivation, but your beliefs don`t have causal effects on the weather. A belief like this is superstitious.
It is also important we don`t waste our time trying to control events we really can't control. Lots of people waste too much of their time, energy, and savings seeking the advice of witchcraft, astrologers and others. People regularly often say that they have magical faculties of insight and control over happening they don`t, prey on people's desire for help, etc. Don't get psychologically dependent on these people and thoughts. Don't be superstition.
SELF-CONFIDENCE AND LIFE SKILLS
Do you know the insides to self-confidence? Is it the approval and assertive feedback from others? Dr. David McClelland, expressed his years of research on self-confidence in a short form. He said the most important factor to expand self-confidence is to master the needed abilities. Someone may say you`re awfully bad at such a task. Even though, but if you know you can do such ask well enough, you can feel confident about it, it doesn`t really matter what they say about you. In the same way, when everybody else tells you are excellent at doing something, but you know that you can`t don't that something well enough, you`ll lack a lot of reliability.
We can expand any faculty by learning -even faculties many people don`t often think of as faculty. Do you think people are born "acting in such a way" "intelligent," or "energetic"? These conditions could be affected by heredity, but these personal characteristics cover most of learning beliefs.
We can get our skills better by watching and learning from others who have a really high level of knowledge, reading, and practicing. The more we get ourselves involved in the learning of the skill, the faster we`ll learn.
And gradually our goals should grow stronger trough time, and we can go through the different stage of learning - going from novice to expert. The same methods of learning is related to interpersonal skills, too. If you`ve been good at learning in one area of your life - such as sports, playing the guitar, or in school - apply the same learning methods that had achieved the desired results to an area where you feel less confidence.
The success and skills in life. How good are basic life skills to succeed in life? Research has shown that life skills are keys to success life`s area. We think that the most pompous type of success is overall the faculty of adaptation we have where we think happiness is. The cognitive, self-management, and interpersonal skills are crucial to every relevant areas of life. For example, all three categories of skills could improve chances for happiness and success in one's career and in one's close relationships.