Losing virginity


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St Jerome, father of the Latin Church once implied “Virginity can be lost by a thought.” This quote stresses on the real definition of losing virginity. Generation Y (people that are born between 1977 and 1997) looks at losing virginity before marriage as something that is ubiquitous for this era. But Generation X (people that are born between 1964 and 1977) and Baby Boomers (people that are born between 1946 and 1964) consider of teens that lose their virginity before they are married as to have lost their honor. People have different thoughts and beliefs on how a person loses his or her virginity. This issue has been aggressively debated in the society for these past few decades. Ultimately, teenagers are the ones that are always blamed, resulting on the elders questioning on why staying a virgin until marriage a lost virtue amongst teens of today. The reasons why teens lose their virginity before marriage are the structure of their family, it supposedly promotes intimacy amongst teenage couples, and the fact that these teenagers consume illegal substances without thinking about its consequences.

First and foremost, family structure is one of the factors teens lose virginity before marriage. Typically, kids who are raised by single parents at all times are bound to create social problems in the society. This notion is evolving into a fact. The issue that could be discussed further within this context is the parental responsibility. It is relatively impossible for a single working mother to give her full commitment and attention to her kids. A research done by the International Medical University (IMU) initiates that teens who are staying with single parents has significantly higher rates of sexual intercourse (qtd. in Singapore Med J). It is proven that the kids tend to express love and gain attention from someone else rather than their biological parents. Josephine Wan-Wen Hadikusumo, President of the Society for Caring Youths, Kota Kinabalu (CARYS) stated that if a daughter does not receive extending support from her father, she will probably be pregnant before marriage (qtd. in Daily Express). Teens need guidance and exposure from both adults on sexual knowledge for a better understanding about their opposite sexes.

Apart from that, teens believe having sex before marriage could promote intimacy in their love affairs. Love is one of the prominent excuses teens lose their virginity. Of late, having a sexual relationship before marriage symbolizes true love. According to Houts, many people think having sex is one of the ways to strengthen a relationship or become closer to their partner (qtd. in Definition and Meaning of Virginity Loss). Obviously, they have misinterpreted the steps to be taken in building a strong and long lasting relationship. Carpenter has done a research on virginity loss and found out that many Gifters (people who view virginity as a gift) believe it would be ideal for a twosome to lose the virginity together (qtd. in Definition and Meaning of Virginity Loss). A teenage couple who loses their virginity together does not signify the bond of intimacy at all. It actually shows the foolishness of the couple in strengthening their relationship. Teens should not give away the virginity for the sake of expression of love as breaking a girl's hymen before marriage is prohibited and against the law.

In addition, teens lose virginity before marriage because of the fact that they consume illegal substances. Generally, we are aware of the outcomes of smoking, taking drugs or excessive intake of alcohol. These substances stimulate a pleasurable sensation throughout the body. The tobacco smoke, smell of alcohol, drugs even more so affects the mind, controls the brain, and one becomes unconscious, thus, triggering the desire of having a sexual intercourse. Hadikosumo stated that high-risk activities related to heavy snuggling, consuming drugs and alcohol influence the decision of carrying sexual activities (qtd. in Daily Express). Teens who love having fun at nightclubs are habitually exposed to many types of hard drugs like marijuana, opium, and heroin. They are used to taking an overdose of the illegal substances. When accompanied by the sensual beat and rhythm of the disco music, the teenagers will without doubt become unconscious and eventually sexual intercourse becomes the final outcome. Study done by the International Medical University (IMU) indicated that sexual activities are positively associated with alcohol and use of drugs (qtd. in Singapore Med J). It is clearly shown that illegal substances are good sex stimulators.

As a whole, sexual intercourse before marriage is not widely practiced by teens within this nation's border. Sex education is very important in order to create awareness on staying virgin until marriage amongst teens. Therefore, children should be taught about sex when they are still young and parents should not keep mum about this particularly insightful issue.

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