Developing different strategies for empathic listening

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Developing different strategies for active, critical, and empathic listening. Being an empathic listener is giving another human being our absolute attention is a supreme gift. To be able to do this well, you have to be able to be accept new ideas, without judgment or expectation and be able to put aside our own needs and concerns and be genuinely available in a warm , heartfelt manner. Yet we live in a culture that teaches and rewards us for being just the opposite: proactive, independent, self-confident and open-minded. As a result, many people equate listening with obedience and lack of determination. We live in a multi-sensory media world that invites us to be in a world of your own with personal connection with others. The communication we have today is lighting fast, with the use of e-mail or instant message (texting) is a poor replacement for live, unconditional human presence.

We can learned and listen in genuinely emphatic way. Hybel &Weaver ,"Listening to other people's feelings, as noted in the introduction to this section, is not just a way of giving emotional support, but it is a way of creating intimacy with others as well." (p95). The first thing we need to learn is to identify the emotions. Hybel &Weaver, "First, listen to what the person is really saying." (p96).Listen to the story this is an "another part of an empathic response is to listen attentively" (Hybel &Weaver, 2007, pg96). When you let someone talk though there, entire problems it is best not to at this point make any judgments but to offer your support. At this point, it would be good at this point to reach the point though paraphrasing this way you can restated the person thoughts in your own words. Hybel &Weaver, "A paraphrase response provides a mirror for the other person's remarks" (pg97).

Hybel & Weaver, "Finally, let the person work out the problem. Sometimes just listening and letting people explain what is upsetting them" (pg97). The most important part of this stage that you do not [at this point] have to solve the problem (p97). The techniques for empathic listening is avoiding interrupting, judgment remarks, verbalize your interpretation and reinterpretation.

'Listening is one of the most important skills you can have' (thetreeofliberty). How well you listen has a major impact on your job effectiveness, and on the quality of your relationships with others. Clearly, listening is a skill that we can all benefit from improving. By becoming a better listener, you will improve your productivity, as well as your ability to influence, persuade negotiate. What's more, you'll avoid conflict and misunderstandings - all necessary for workplace success.'(mindtool);(thetreeofliberty) .

Active listening, Hybel &Weaver, "we will devote most of our time to it" (pg93). We use active listening "to obtain direction, understand others, love problems, and share interests" (p93). "A better way to become a better listener is to practice to be a better listener."(thetreeof liberty) This is where you make an effort to hear what one saying, but the words they are saying is most important try to understand the entire message being sent out. To do this you have to pay close attention to what the person saying carefully. Active listening you have to enhance your listening skills by not allowing yourself to become distracted by the things around you.

"Being an active listener does not necessarily mean a long sessions spent listening to grievances, personal or otherwise. It is simply a way of approaching those problems which arise out of the usual day-to-day events of any job" (Roger & Farson, 2007, p1).

To enhance your skill of listening, you should let the person know that you are fully listening to what they are saying. So that they know that, they are getting the message across. Something as a nod or simple words "uh huh", "I see," this is letting them know that you are not agreeing but you are listening and paying attention to them.

What we need to do to become an active listener is get inside the speaker, and sees his point of view. We should listen with meaning, we need to try to understand the message that the speaker is trying to get across. Try to respond with feeling by asking yourself with questions "What is he/she is trying to tell me?" Remember that not all communication is verbal. We should note their facial expression such as body posture, eye movements, also there breathing this help the speaker totally get their message across to the listener.

There are five keys to becoming an active listener. One, is pay attention- look at the speaker, avoid being distracting by your surrounding and "listen" to the speaker body language. Two, show you are listening by nodding your head occasionally, using facial expression such as; smile, letting the speaker continue with small, comments, such as uh, huh or yes. Three, provide feedback- to clarify a certain point ask a question and by paraphrasing what the speaker is saying such as "Sound like you are saying"……. Four, defer judgment - always allow the speaker to finish speaking to do not interrupt. Five, respond appropriately- treat others, as you would want to be treated. Be open and honest with your responses tried not to put the speaker down. At this point, active listening is an example for respect and understanding.

"It takes a lot of paying attention and self-control to become an active listener. 'Old habits are hard to break, and your listening habits are as bad as many people's are, then there are a lot of habit-breaking to do'! (mindtool).

'Be deliberate set aside all other thoughts and behaviors and try to concentrate on the message'(thetreeofliberty) "Ask question, reflect, and paraphrase to ensure you understand the message"(mindtool).

Tip: If you find yourself, having difficulty concentrate on what someone is saying-if you find yourself drifting try to repeat their works mentally as they are saying them.

'Critical listening is a form of listening that if usually not mentioned, since it involves analysis, critical think and judgment'(work911).

'The importance and value of critical listening, when it comes to real life, listening critically is used every day (work911).' 'The key though, is to try to understand the other person FIRST, before one evaluates (work911)' 'about what is being said' (changing mind).

"This form of listening requires significant real-time cognitive effort as the listener analyzes what is being said, relating it to existing knowledge and rules, whilst simultaneously listening to the ongoing words from the speaker"(changing minds). When critical listening-you have to put yourself as a reporter or journalist because people are trying t "persuading" you to do something or believe something. (Hybels & Weaver, 2007, pg 94). Hybels &Weaver, critical listening is vitally important." (pg94)

As a listener, you must be aware of your values and attitude, especially when you hear information you might resist or disagree with (Hybels & Weaver, 2007, pg 95).

There are benefits for be a good critical listener which knowing how to separate fact from opinions and how to withhold personal judgment and make sure you are fair. Critical listener knows to remain calm and know when they are right and are likely to fall for any type of miss leading tricks the speaker is

After the research of as an active, empathic, critical listener, the conclusion to become a good active listener is researching out the speaker and reflecting the person that you understand what he/she is saying. As being a critical listener, is try drawing a conclusion based on the facts and observation you got from the speaker; this is where you can develop good skills by asking meaningful question. The benefits of becoming a empathic listener is to build trust, trying to reduce tension, encourage your speaker to get you more information and making them feel safe. So overall becoming a good listener, you gain, trust, build teamwork, and gain valid information about the speaker.

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