This essay has been submitted by a student. This is not an example of the work written by our professional essay writers.
At a general glimpse, current literature is flooded with examples of mother's love, her sacrifice and her importance. But to understand why does she love her kids so much. From where does this love come? What to call about nature. Here an effort is made to elaborate and help other understand why does this all takes place? Different dimensions of her love that leads to question; why mother is so important in one's life and in society. Plus how deep roots of appreciation for mother have been?
Mother's Day; also known as Mother's Sunday has its roots back down deep in history. Mothering Sunday primarily is Christian celebration having influence from Roman traditions & initially from Greek mythology where a day used to be celebrated to pay tribute to Mother of Gods. Due to its background and origin from non-Muslim world; few of Muslim families believe that following this tradition may represent their liking for another religion. This may lead to added essence of betrayal from current religion. Although in modern world; it is no more treated as religious celebration. Instead it is being celebrated as way of paying tribute to one's own Mother.
When is Mother's Day?
Hence origin of this celebration for "Mother's Day" is not dependant over some government or NGO; this has been derived due to cultural influence of multiple religions, societies and mythologies; eventually gaining its popularity almost in all corners of modern world. Majority of countries have different days which they celebrate as "Mother's Day" for different reasons. In Pakistan second Sunday of May is considered as "Mother's Day" because we follow USA with this respect like many other countries (United States, Australia, Belgium, Brazil, Canada, Denmark, Finland, Germany, Greece, India, Italy, Japan, New Zealand, Singapore and Turkey).
(Austria, Hong Kong, Netherlands, Taiwan, Hungary, Portugal, South Africa, and Spain) celebrate on first Sunday in month of May. Rest of the world has its own reasons and particular dates assigned for celebration of "Mother's Day"
Mother's Day and Muslims:
Mothers having great place in Islam (http://www.ezsoftech.com/stories/motherday.asp), (http://islam.about.com/od/elderly/a/mothers.htm), (http://www.witness-pioneer.org/vil/Articles/women/wmn_islm.html), fact helped this event to attain popularity quickly in countries with Muslim majority likewise it attained popularity in rest of the world. In Islam; especially for male; most important personality is simply his mother.
Mother's Day in Pakistan:
Mother's Day is celebrated with full zeal & zest in Pakistan; accompanied with strong media campaign. With every passing year majority of companies with their strong advertisement war; help this event be celebrated in Pakistani society with even higher intensity than previous year; which is increasing year by year.
Other than this; in contrast with Valentine's Day (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ValentineHYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valentine's_Day"'HYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valentine's_Day"s_Day), (http://www.history.com/topics/valentines-day) it is considered as more sacred and getting its place in our society well.
Purpose of this article is to explore few aspects of "Mother's Day" and as of my field (Psychology); attempt will be to attain its influence over multiple personalities & eventually over society. Few of major components to be coved in this article are given below:
Importance of Mother
Why do Mother Love her children
Impact of Mother's Day
Shall we Celebrate Mother's Day?
Importance of Mother:
Importance of Mother cannot be ignored it is well said by many societies, scholars and multiple writers. But what is so special about mother that her importance cannot be ignored? It has already been mentioned that attempt is to see her importance in both perspective, with respect to individuals and for society as well. Most important fact about Mother is that; her feeling of love and affection is quite hard to replicate. And her actions of selflessness and uncountable sacrifice are same in almost all of religions, societies, nations, and almost in all species as well.
First of all if we try to observe lifecycle of human being, majority will have first lover as their Mother; child may forget by time maturity is attained. But there has always been time when child could not sleep without mother. Is it really so important? That leads to statement "importance of mother cannot be ignored". Well! Even if this single most obvious variable of just sleeping is taken; then answer would be "yes". Because having physical soft touch of mother makes infant feel secure; which latter results in more healthy and confidant human being. And there are a lot of other reasons (for importance of mother) to follow. Mothers are first at many things and even where they may not be first; their influence is very important over provided factors.
Mother's are First:
All above factors play very important role in development of human's / animal's personality. Being loved is requirement of child; having need of friend arise being toddler or before. Same goes for having urged of confidant. And in pursuit of attaining maturity; her first teacher designs personality; due to which humans can also be called as "Mother's design". Hence her importance is vital.
Attempt has been made to elaborate; how influential mother's role is in one's life; once this well understood. It must not be of much difficulty to know that how important her role is in society. Easiest way to change society is to just change mothers and we will have changed society for coming generation. Because from her womb till maturity children believe most in mother; often it gets to level of intensity where it is believed by kids that mother is always right and can never be wrong.
Though this intensity of trust may be harmful for learning societies; but for young, untouched minds this believe leads to tremendous foundation of speedy future learning and whatever get delivered by this example of godly figure; often stays in mind of humans relatively forever.
Why Do Mother Love her Children:
It cannot be said wrong if one states "Mothers are bound to love children." Love for her child begins to develop even before birth of a child. Primarily we can divide reason of her love for children in two major portions;
Psychological aspect mainly includes "Mother-Child Relationship"; but it also includes expectation from family and society. At times Sociological/psychological Mothers love more than child's biological mothers with reason of intense relationship that get developed over period of time; as she may be in her natural need brining up child; her love get especially fueled up when kid develops ultimate feel of security and loyalty towards mother. Knowing that she is the one who safe guard him/her more than anyone in this world; feel of security accompanied with feel of love / friendship between child and mother develops strong bond among each other and eventually results in very strong relationship for life.
Often psychological relationship is considered more than biological reasons; no doubt that mothers began to love their kids even before their birth. Due to feel of movement in their womb they develop a lot of affiliation; after birth they believe their kids as part of their being. Unique sense of realizing her child as another being; results in uncontrollable love for life.
Although as elaborated above; just like any other relation, sense of friendship and understanding among each other leads to better and stronger relationship. Here is no art and set rule for mothers to know how they should love their children and how they can develop strongest bond. Just know that they are part of your being; even if mother didn't give birth. Moment mother will realize sense of having child as part of her being; same level; or even higher level love can be experienced.
Moment children began to speak; observing them as proof of really another being makes mother even happier and they began to love their children even more. In case mothers become best friend of child; that few may make mistake by thinking that kids may not know what they are talking about may destroy their relationship. Here is advise for young mothers; that they better not discuss confidential matters (although very childish) with anyone (including father) told to them by their kids/toddlers especially male.
Although majority of mothers keep secrets to them; about whatever their child tells them. And due to very initial agreeable communication exercised among mother and child; they both began to understand each other well. Even when kids grow up and may develop different thought process than mothers. Mothers easily remember what they are to them; and how agreeable communication used to take place among them; which results in continuous feel of love from mother to child.
For children adopted in their teens; it is often found hardest for mothers to develop nice relationship with kids. But just like any other relationship; in case urge of being loved is present in kids who has been brought by very harsh biological parents or in orphanage. They end up responding much more to love of their mother. Explained behavior results in natural response of loving kids in "need" by women (mothers); as explained earlier; in order to get true mother's love developed. Women need to believe these kids as "their" property; as their being. Once this step is well taken; rest follows naturally.
As a bottom-line; women become mothers moment they believe kids to be "theirs"; no matter how old they are and from which race they may be; mothers end up developing unique feel of bringing them up as they attain very high level of satisfaction by observing them grow. Taking them to life; and after they turn into mature beings. She enjoys her life with sense of accomplishment which stays in her un-conscious mind that she is the one who brought these young adults well. On other hand great sorrow in heart of mother burst up; if her kids turn out to be "bad" either tagged by society or family. Moment she will believe that her kids are not "good". This believe will make her sad, but often she will make an immediate attempt to fulfill any gap in training whatever deemed appropriate to her.
That in modern world is often considering as intervention of "Old Moms" in "Families". Families those are named now; a key member of whom used to be "her" property once. This intense and unique composition of emotionally filled heart often results in maternal love.
Hormonal composition of females; especially Mother leads to greater love for children and once "Mother-child" relation is established. This flows with time. Key factor in this hormonal composition is played by hormone named as "Prolactin hormone". This is often present in greater quantity in females than males.
This without any doubt is very precious relation; (for a mother at least). Nothing unique of relation can be as of Mother-Son Relationship; as of previous article about love. Effort was to elaborate maximum about love; and in this relation a unique combination of all types of love can be seen. Without considering it as any social taboo; if seen, Son competes love of her mother in love triangle where for Son; Father is additional extra; particularly when he wishes to have some uninterrupted conversation with his beloved mommy. And after being grown up; mother competes for his love where for mother her daughter in law is considered as additional extra when she wishes to have time out of external intrusions with his lovely Son.
Mothers often wish that her Son should try seeing his father as figure to aspire from; as at latter stage he has to face the world just like his father is doing. Although her undying love for her son; keep her son comforted in her presence. Plus at times when she is being flooded with love of adult male; and bound to fill many requirements. Son at times feel threatened due to presence of father. At times they may find father as interference between Son & beloved mommy.
Males right from birth find it hard to share their love with anyone; conflict with father is common phenomenon but with appropriate training and time distribution by mother it can be well handled. Although not only fathers; more conservative little males (Son) may even find it irritating to share his mommy with kitchen, laundry, other siblings, uncles, aunts, or even friends/colleagues of Mom. Obviously here discussion is being done over extreme cases. But these little males try to drag attention of Mom's by every possible way; this at times may result in irritation at part of mother. If they get scolded; even higher intensity of hatred get developed in tiny heart of little male member. Because now that external intrusion is not only taking time of mommy; it is also taking her love away.
This we observe; when Sons end up kicking upcoming guests, breaking glass, time and again requests of going to wash room, hug, listening to their story. Fighting with other kids; at crux; every possible attempt is made to attain back attention of Mother.
These little males once make mark in heart of Mama; they may forget how hard they fought to attain place in heart of this women; which was no easy job and they definitely spent several decades exercising it. Although after attaining their adult hood they may forget about all their efforts as now their attention is gathered by some young lady in their life. Though sweet old lady "Mama" now wishes to give him all the love he has been asking for. And for all the attention that he has made his mommy in habit of.
Once that level of attention seems to deem off; Mothers may end up becoming over possessive about their Sons; just as he used to be. She may even feel irritated from his video game, friends, girl-friends, wife, social circle, car, business etc. Although majority of Moms just end up shedding their tears and wiping them at their own as they do not want their lovely Son to get interrupted from their joyous life. Waiting for their 30 seconds call in which they hardly ask "How are you Mama? (Without really meaning it)", and before having complete answer they may hang up. Obviously their answer often ends up "I am fine Son (Without really meaning it)". And these sweet old ladies keep their heart excessively filled with love for their young Sons; waiting for his love to ever come back. When he used to tug her near her knee; requesting, pleading and begging her just to say "Please look at me MAMA!" lucky are few who may get such behavior repeated; as societies even consider young Sons to stay rock solid. Majority of Mums close their eyes; waiting for any such lovely response from their loved Sons to be ever repeated; sweet loving old ladies. They may even get to close their eyes at their own; as these young adults may be "busy" elsewhere. Providing her just one day and bouquet of flowers in return as compensation of her valued love; although it is strongly believed that she must have been satisfied with that one day after her passing away. Because Mom had; little or no expectations; from her lovely Son (which was just lovely for her).
Enough of explanation about complexities of Mother-Son Relationship; Mother-Daughter relationship is way easier to understand. Though it is well said that Sons are often more loved by Mothers and Daughters are often more loved by fathers. But without a doubt everyone's origin is a mother. And first ever communication made is also with mother.
One might have gone through terminologies such as "Mama's Boy" & "Dad's little girl" just as explained in Mother-Son relationship here may be feel of sharing mother with father; in this case father having opposite gender may take attraction of both; Mother & Daughter. This may result in strained relationship between Mother & daughter; as daughters have feeling that Mother took some portion of love from father. Where these two ideal friends may end up breaking up especially when daughter attain age between 30 to 40 years. Even after growing up unconscious strain can be there in hear of daughter. Following are most common aspects that may lead to conflict
External environment variables
To this commonly we call as generation gap; although its combination of multiple things that leads to any conflict. Society changes; and one generation gives hold to another; after growing up depending upon her training, daughter may have more desires with respect to her career; whereas mother may have some other expectations from her daughter. As she expects to see her daughter just like herself.
With that said; in case daughter get trained well and Mom's expectations are met. Mother-Daughter relationship can easily be categorized as Philia; Mother often ends up creating another "me". They both can be friends, after growing up their interests may match and no company may be enjoyed as much as it goes with mother. Daughters look forward to their Mums as figure to be. And in case Mother is perceived as success in life; chances are that daughters may end up following each and every thing that Mothers do. Furthermore they may try to eliminate all negatives that may find in their mothers and try to be like their mothers; except few things that they want to change in their lives.
With respect to Mothers love; it without a doubt flows uncontrollably for daughters as well. She stays in pursuit of making them even better mothers. Here societal pressure lies. In case all mothers train their daughters to be best of wives and sons to be best of husbands. Future couples will have least chances of experiencing any conflicts. But as Mothers are also humans they often end up training their daughters just like themselves.
Daughters find more similarities in Mothers and end up establishing rapport at early age very quickly. Before stage of verbal communication arise Mother-Daughter already have chemistry developed that is likely to be better than Mother-Son would have at this early stage; as Sons may take greater time understanding their mother and often stay in greater pursuit of occupying mother than learning her. Daughters instead from very early age try to be more supportive and understanding than Sons. They do get jealous of siblings whenever they will find their beloved mummy to be shared by someone alike. But unlike Sons they may not end up getting to stage where they get jealous from things, activities, and father even. Though exceptions are always there.
Impact of Mother's day:
Here is no objection about it that expression of loves aggravates love. Majority of flirts end up winning emotions just by playing game of few words and non-verbal muscular movements. Winning undying loving heart of already loving mother is definitely way easy job to be done. Like every relationship formal celebration for reminder of love results in increase of it. Wedding Anniversaries get celebrated, Birthdays are celebrated and many other such occasions makes key figure feel elevated and generates some reason to keep living happily. Having reason of doing something is known as simplest definition of "motivation". Hence it leads to motivation of living with higher contentment. And giving one day in whole year to Mother for paying gratitude of her undying efforts is way too less. Although it is yet great moment; where even in shy societies with respect to emotional expression; can end up expressing love for their mothers. Especially in Asian countries, including Pakistan; people often find it difficult to express their love. Especially to their family members; this occasion helps from kids to adults in expressing their love for beloved mommy.
As celebration takes place; majority of mothers will find themselves putting more effort in their maternal duties; and if observed in context of productivity; overall productivity is likely to increase as all kids and adults will find themselves more contended due to boosted up love given by their mothers. Once all mothers are giving more of what they have been; it will result in greater productivity of kids. It is likely to give positive impact over all influenced members. Giving feel to young mothers that how greatly rewarding is exercise of motherhood; and to old ladies it provides feel of honor. Because mothers keep very low expectations from kids; just celebration of one day results in great gratification and satisfaction at Mother's end.
Shall we celebrate Mother's Day? :
Question should rightly be phrased as "Shall every society celebrate Mother's day?" in one word "Yes". And as answer has been given in positive for all societies in world; so is it true for our society as well. In case this word "We" involved Pakistan or Muslim world. In both the cases celebration needs to be conducted having philosophy at heart; in Islam especially every day is mother's day. Mothers have been esteemed very much and great concentration is paid to expression though actions for thanking one's Mother.
This includes Mothers being more important than fathers, instructions can be found for breaking one's prayer even; in case Mother calls. And from Verses it is inferred that top three slots with respect to importance need to be given to Mother. After her; father get placed which in reality is 4th slot.
Other than religious perspective; with argument provided above. Societies end up having greater satisfaction in case Mothers are more motivated and productive. So it be religious perspective, societal or modern philosophy of productivity; In any case Mother's day need to be celebrated